Album Review: Mariah Carey Me. I Am Mariah… The Elusive Chanteuse

First things first, I would like to welcome a founding member of Luscious Judy back to the blog!! When it comes to music and pop culture, Noel is THE GURU. For almost 10 years now, I have relied on him to supply me (and our friend-family) with the hits, before the radio gets ’em, before they’re played out. He knows which celebrity rumors are true/false and that Beyoncé is in fact, a member of the Illuminati. A lover of booty poppin, this B has an affinity for belting out R&B hits in his car (RIP EXPLORER) while also saving room on the mix CD for Reba McIntyre and Rilo Kiley. Eclectic does not even begin to describe his taste in music. WELCOME BACK, BISH. (Find him on twitter, @KettleCooked)



Album Review: Mariah Carey Me. I Am Mariah… The Elusive Chanteuse

We’ve been waiting for Mariah to make her return and give us the soundtrack to life. Me. I Am Mariah is a good album that, like the best albums do,  gets better with repeat listens.  Songs I was on the fence about evolve into favorites.  It’s a more subtle M.C. then we’ve heard lately(subway gowns and all) and truly balances old and new Mariah in a way that should please every Lamb. By not joining forces with today’s hot act, but choosing features that come with a reminiscent feel built in, she comes off confident not desperate. She’s whispering nostalgia while staying relevant. Pretty impressive for a pretty and impressive artist on her 14th studio album. ‘ The Elusive Chanteuse’ has shades of Carole King and samples from Wu-Tang Clan, yet it comes off authentic and effortless. The album is incredibly cohesive given the amount of producers, 12 total, and that is to Carey’s credit behind the scenes and as a performer. Music is Mariah’s science and she is the Einstein of her peers.

Luscious Tracks:

Cry – Emotional, piano led ballad that builds beautifully and let’s Mariah show us her range and control.

Faded – My choice for single. Mariah reflects on a past lover, over a Mike WiLL Made It beat that knocks and sways throughout. The kind of song  that liquor and reminiscing makes perfect. You end up drunk(faded) and singing the shit out of every lyric.  The last minute of the song is my favorite moment on the album.

Make it Look Good –  The kind of song that sounds like summer. I love songs about having a crush and Mariah captures the jubilation. The song has  interpolations of “Let Me Make Love to You” made famous by The O’Jays and featuresStevie Wonder going solo on the harmonica. The best song on the album, just blissful, luscious fun. Should be the biggest hit on the album.

Meteorite – Produced by Q-tip and Mariah. The disco beat lifts off and Mariah takes flight. The kind of song you put on when you’re getting ready to go out.

Money ($*/…) –  Hit-Boy produced slow bumper about the fact that money means nothing if you don’t have your boo.





gimme more

i opened this week’s People and stopped on this picture of britney lookin sexy mama status. her legs are on my radar. keep it up britney. i love you being a mama right now. take some time(s) and give me jams in 2011.

blonde hair with black roots hasn't looked this good since 'romy'

r.i.p. aaliyah

i can’t believe it’s been nine years since she has passed! i still remember the day it happened, ironically i had just stepped off of a plane and heard the terrible news. she’s still the most beautiful woman that has existed in r&b (in this judy’s opinion) her music always brings me back to some really great memories. i honestly do think her music is timeless. she is forever missed.


love aaliyah… i remember waking up to the news on saturday morning while getting ready to go to subway and be an artist. the “making the video: rock the boat” should be on DVD. ultimate summer jam… best CGI water since waterfalls


Holding You Down

What More Can I Say?

New Jazmine Sullivan is amazing. Her debut disc was one of my favorites that year. Jazmine can sing circles around almost anyone in the game. Missy produced something for everyone. The one foot in the past, one in the future production and mash of samples is a genius way to reflect the lyrical content of the song. This is how you craft a classic. You can feel every emotion in Jazzy’s textured vocals. I see this blowing up by summers end.


can we talk about what courtney wore today? first of all, since when has anyone ever referred to cuckoo love as CLC (courtney love cobain) or CLO (i’m pretty sure that name already belongs to a rapper and a dice game)? apparently, the blog is supposed to counteract all of the bad photos of her that are on the internet. this explains why there are 24 pages of photos and the blog has only been up for about 10 days. look, i get it, there are actually people out there that love this woman. but they might be delusional ….page 8 of WCWT claims that CLC originated the asymmetrical bob phase that was popularized by judy goddess, victoria beckham. (she wishes) and on pages 12/13 there are highly defensive posts about how CLC isn’t actually an author of the blog and blasting readers for giving her shit about her spelling….(but seriously, labotin instead of louboutin….need i say more?)

look, i’m PMSing. i know i’m being bitchy but this is my issue: you can put lipstick on a pig, but its still a pig and you can put couture on a hag and she’s still a hot trailer park mess. malibu is totally a great song and i will sing doll parts anytime for karaoke but when did this bitch get promoted from oxy-whore to balenciaga snob? i don’t get it. who allowed this to happen? is everyone else delusional too?

look CLC, money can buy you lots of pills, but it cant buy you class! sorry madonna got the louis ad first.